Thursday, December 27, 2012

One Year Down - (Germany) Day 366

Today was almost exactly the same as yesterday. Get to work, read a little in the conference room until the contractor comes in and I'm able to get the key to my office. I then go in my office, read some more, do a little cleaning (the bookshelf today), then take off for the day at lunch time.

On another note I've completed an entire year here in Germany. As I look back and reflect on this year I'm appreciative of being in Germany, but very disappointed with the unit I ended up in and the work I have ended up doing. Back before I came, I was very excited to be in an actual signal unit. I figured everything I did would be related to computers and networks…everything I signed up to do in the army. I was also excited for the chance to be able to travel and explore Europe with my wife.

I arrived and was immediately surprised at how unorganized everything was. I remember spending days during in-processing wondering what I was supposed to be doing. Finally I started my job only to be transferred to the ComSec vault after about 5 minutes of training. Finding out exactly what ComSec involved was pretty disappointing. Here I was ready to do something with computers or networks and I find out that I'm basically going to be a librarian checking out encryption keys and making sure people sign on the correct line. What a joke that this is considered a 25B job. In fact you don't even need a computer to do the job. On top of that I couldn't believe all the stupid stuff we had to do all the time. The training is crap, it seems that instead of people, we are just numbers. The people in charge just want to make sure the box is checked so they can call it good. I feel in the year I've spent here, I have become stupider…if that is a word. In I.T. it seems the technology is always changing, since I don't do my job anymore I feel I'm not keeping pace with everything. Instead of expanding my technological knowledge…I've been falling behind.

On the bright side, my wife and I have been able to see some pretty incredible places. We have also met some awesome people. The people I work with have been really great for the most part and I have no complaints with them…just the "upper management". I've been able to visit old friends I made back when I was an exchange student over 20 years ago. I have no complaints except I wish I had more money so we could go and see more.

I've ended up on what seems like an endless temporary profile. Everything the army has checked or tried to do to help, has done little to help with my pain. I have headaches ranging from very minor to very extreme on an almost daily basis. My knee has a dull pain that never goes away and feels swollen most of the time.

Finally the whole issue with my blog going public has been very troublesome. I've been alienated from everyone. I've been yelled at and treated like crap from the command. I am now in limbo working as the chaplain's assistant, reporting to him and my old boss as well. Sometimes I'm not sure who to tell what. I also don't hear a lot of what's going on, where to report, what I need to do…if I do it seems as though it's last minute. I've come to the point where I have passed the point of caring. I could care less what they decide to do with me. I can't make any plans until I hear something, so everyday my wife and I are wondering what is going to happen. It's put a lot of stress on both of us.

As of now, I have no clue how long I'll be here in Germany. I'd like to stay longer so we can see more. I'd love to visit Italy, The Netherlands, Poland, Belgium, Austria, Switzerland, and much more. I also wouldn't mind just getting out, I can't imagine 2 more years like the last month. Heidelberg is closing later next year, so whatever happens we will not be staying here. I will have to just wait…wait…..wait…and then see what happens. Hopefully my next year will be better than this one.

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